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My Breakfast with George Lucas!

Listening to: “The Liar” by The Adolescents
George saw a mouse at the race track and just leapt into my arms. What the hell am I gonna do with this guy?

       Before I start, let me say I was legitimately disappointed. The entire day was spent in disbelief because it was so real. Some of you will shake your heads, the rest will understand completely. If you are in the latter group we’ll have a drink later. If you haven't gathered it yet, this was only a dream. Sniff sniff... whimper. The best dream ever.

So my dream starts with me sitting in the Park Plaza diner near where I live in Brooklyn Heights. I’m having a pancake stack with a big glass of milk. I start to look through the paper that’s sitting in the booth next to me. Suddenly George Lucas comes out of the bathroom and sits down. I’m not shocked or anything cause apparently we’re having breakfast together. I look at him and say “So man, how’s it going?” George says “Ehhhh...” I reply “What’s the matter? Is your omelette crap?” George says “Nah. It’s just... y’know, I can’t walk down the street without someone giving me shit about the new Star Wars Trilogy. It’s been a few years and I’m still getting flack for it.” I tell him “Well, it was pretty... ah, whatever.” George begs me to continue. I do with “Well, it wasn’t in the same vein as the first three was it? It was more for children and not really a prequel to the movies we all became fans of.” He agrees and says “Well, I just wanted to try to- er, I mean, I-” He stops and comes clean. “I just didn’t care. I never thought this would be my entire life Kash. I want to do other things.”  I tell him “George, George... you can do other stuff man. But this thing is bigger than you. It’s Star Wars. It’s a big deal.”

George asks me what he should do. I tell him “Remember when we went to go see Hulk? The Ang Lee version.” George makes a disgusted face. “Yeah I remember that piece of garbage. I don’t know what Lee was thinking. You hated it too.”  “Yes I did George, Yes I did but then what happened?” George shrugs and I say “They just made another one. Dude, just do them again.” George says “I don’t know Kash. Just pretend like the first attempt never happened?”  “No.” I say “You made what you made. That’s more than tons of people even get close too. Just do it from a different point of view...” George says “Or universe!” We both stop, look at each other and smile deviously.

“Man, you can make it with the machinery looking similar to the 70’s style you had in A New Hope.” George says “Yeah, with cooler aliens all over the place!” I sigh and say “No man... You know why I loved the first trilogy? Because of the limitations and how you overcame them.” George says “I got it. I made the movie when I was 32. I need to come at this like a 32 year old director!” I say “There you go. That sounds like it’ll work. Remember it’s 1976 too.” George looks at me and says “You know Kash, you’re 32...” I start to smile. “You want to help me write it?” And just as I’m about to answer I wake up.

I woke my girlfriend up and told her what had just happened. She is a very patient woman. She consoled and then rocked me back to sleep . Know how you try to go back to bed and slip back into the dream you just had? No such luck. Anyways, here we are in reality. A world with three “Meh” additions to the Star Wars universe. A world where I’m not writing the prequels. It could be worse though. How? I have no idea. So to put a cap on this bottle of sorrow I’d like finish with a personal message to George Lucas.  “Hey man, it’s me Kash. If you’re not doing anything later, let’s grab a bite. I know this great diner. You’ll love it.”

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